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The Strawberry Letter: My Boyfriend Hates the Word NO

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Subject: My Boyfriend Hates the Word NO

Dear Steve and Shirley, I’m a flight attendant and my schedule is very demanding because I do international flights. I’m in town for a few days and I’m gone for a few days. My boyfriend hates that his goodies aren’t there for him daily. He calls it goodies and you call it the cookie. Anyway, I need him to realize that there’s more to life than his goodies. He hates the word NO so when I am not in the mood, he pouts. It causes a whole shift in our relationship. He uses it as an excuse to second guess my commitment to him so I may never get an engagement ring. We’re both 29 and we’ve been together for a little over 4 years and just moved in together. I know I can do better, but I’m trying to hold on because I love this man from his head to his toes and I can’t see myself growing old with anyone else. I’m very religious as well and he’s not. He’ll go to church with me and he’s even gone to bible study when I’m in town but I shouldn’t have to force him to go. A lot of small things I ask him to do, he gives me pushback on them. I’ve taught him all about etiquette and now he’s able to pick out nice restaurants for us. When I tell you that we’re compatible everywhere except the bedroom, I’m so serious. That brings me to why I really tell him no when he wants my goodies. His goody goody isn’t all of that and I have to be in the mood to put on a show for him if you know what I mean. I make up excuses a lot and he’s on to me. I consider an oral hookup just as valuable as giving the goodies up, but he does not think so. He wants everything and he wants it often. He really hates when I tell him no, so how can I enhance the experience for myself so I can say ‘yes’ more? Can bad sex get better over time?


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