Dear Mr. Harvey and Ms. Strawberry,
I am a man in my late 30s who has been in a relationship with an older woman for a few years. We have a great relationship, none of them are perfect, but we communicate well and that makes what we have even more special, or so I thought. The other night after an intense love making session, because I did not produce what she felt was enough sex in bed, she asked me if I had slept with her 22 year old daughter. I have ZERO idea where she would get a notion like this. I love and adore her, and her three kids, I treat them just like my own. Mr. Harvey, I would not in this lifetime, the next lifetime, in a dream, or in any other way do something like this. I would never do ANYTHING to harm her or the kids. I lost it, I cursed her completely out. I know that was wrong, but how could she ask me something like that! I told her that the mere fact that she could ask me that question suggest that she thinks I am capable of something like that and that she should already KNOW the answer to that question. The next morning, she said to me that she was only trying to protect her kids as a mother should. I explained to her that her question was about me being consenting and intimate with her child, not about me trying to force myself on her. I told her that she CAN'T think that; because if she did, she would not have me around AT ALL, but we have been pretty much living together for two years now. I spoke to her daughter who was as upset and hurt by the accusation as I was. My girlfriend says her daughter and I are making a bigger deal out of the question than it is. She says she feels like we are stretching the question to mean something that it is not and that it was just a question. How do I get this woman to understand the accusation, insinuation, and disrespect that she showed both her daughter and myself by asking that question?